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Tuesday, November 13, 2018

Death Cafe'

Yesterday we had a community of friends gather for an event that was curious.  A Death Cafe' was something that you signed up for (though several people just dropped in and were welcomed).  There were small tables and coffee, tea, and snacks like one would nibble while sitting at a cafe'.  We were interested in the topic of Death, being something we all will experience, and seldom just talk about.

(A typical cafe' - but not where we meet!)


Well, I guess I may be different, in that I post things here about my experiences of those who die.  Some of that may also be considered the grief process.  We didn't talk about that so much.

And I currently read a blog about elder concerns, where the blogger is currently dying and sharing her experiences and thoughts, as well as a lot of others who comment there. (Time Goes By)

We had some simple questions to consider, but by no means to follow exactly.  And we were chatty people so had a lot to say.  "When was your first experience of death?"  That seemed to bring some really thoughtful responses.

And "what do you want to do before you die?"

That was a bit harder to answer.  Many (most) of us were in the elder category (over 60 probably.) So we'd lost people, and were some thinkers about our own mortality.

And it got really funny at times.

I loved the hearty laughs when we thought of our relatives and their beliefs of the after-life...and how they couldn't all have been right.  Some of them may have been very disappointed.

Of course I can't tell you what anyone said, which means we were sharing in confidentiality.  And since we already knew each other by being part of the same community, it was sharing a bit differently than if we were strangers (I think.)

I am glad I experienced the Death Cafe' and thank those who organized it.  I don't imagine I'll be going to another one, but perhaps in a few years I might.  Who knows.

2 comments:

robin andrea said...

I love the idea of the "death cafe." It's such an important subject and most people don't really like to talk about it. We're all heading in that direction, and it's good to share experiences.

Mystic Meandering said...

I have heard of this... on NextDoor. But I thought it was for those who recently lost a loved one - like a grief group. Didn't know they discussed "death" in general. My 90 year old mother has already begun her downward spiral I think (which could take years). It's difficult to watch her deteriorate, lose her memory and cognitive abilities, etc. The one positive thing is she has become more loving and affectionate, something she wasn't when I was growing up. I also wonder about my own mortality as well, as I feel my own body winding down. Don't know how comfortable I would feel talking about all this in a "mixed" group with different beliefs about death. And for me it's not the actual death, so much as *how* we die, how we wind down and lose our faculties, which is already happening for me. I do believe there is a website called "Death Cafe". Might look into it. :) Thanks for sharing your post! :)