Update about blogCa

Tuesday, January 31, 2023

Three months ago feels like a year ago

  OK, this is my brainstorming...not quoting anyone who has better ideas.

Time really has changed drastically for me in the last, say, six months.

I was having lunch with my friend C, and we had gone with others on a particular outing. We both thought it must have been a year before the last. It definitely was a loooong time ago in both of our memories.

I pulled up my calendar and there it was, early October 2022. I had aready said that was our first trip in my new car, which was purchased sometime last Aug. or early Sept. Not a date I remember right off hand.

So we remembered the first place we went, that we made purchases there, so no difficulty remembering those details. It still felt like forever back in our lives, though by the calendar 3 months ago.

And then I remembered next we had had lunch at the Country Club...which had also slipped our minds. And then, wasn't there one more place we went?

Oh yes, the apple orchard! We had apple pie a la mode, and watched some clog dancers just practicing to a band that was just starting its set. I really don't remember how we came home, though it was along familiar roads about 30 miles away.

But why did it feel so long ago to both of us?


We thought about November. I think it just rolled along at the regular rate of doing things. Nothing special. I was engaged in a couple of interesting committees, had a few Dr. visits for this that and the other. I shrugged off Thanksgiving, and when my minister asked me if I had had a good one, I said "No." But it didn't really bother me.

Then there were the holidays...where time kind of stopped for both of us. We had major anxieties about the holidays (and we're not even related) mainly dealing with families. It was as if we fell into a well, where time went terrribly slowly, while we pushed ourselves to do what we thought we could, and just stopped at other things.

That well of time lasted till sometime in January, but I'm not totally out of it yet. I had my usual fever of no known cause, off and on, which happens every winter these days. It wasn't bad enough that I couldn't go to committee meetings and do blogs. And I did wrangle some antibiotics for the "if it gets worse- take before pneumonia" stage.

But then I lost my appetite a couple of weeks ago. So after 6 pounds lost, I went to my doc (whose office is across the street) and we tried an antidepressant. It didn't get me back into meetings. I keep on the blog, but you all don't know if I'm dressed or not!

I cancelled several medical tests...it was just too hard to drag myself into clothes, driving the 15 miles to Asheville, and dealing with all those people. I did one load of laundry...out of the 4 sitting there. The dishes are all dirty and my maid (me) hasn't done but one sinkfull. But that's one of each of those things, which might be a regular thing to do for other folks.

I also refused about 3 invitations from my friend for lunch. But yesterday I finally said yes, and we have a good habit of catching up with lots of things...deeper than the weather. The wait staff at the restaurant were a bit impatient, but it's not a rush at 3 o'clock. So that's when the trip in Oct. came up and we started looking at our time experiences.

We definitely saw a rush that peaked about the time we collapsed into our respective depressed and time stopping wells. And we see that some things are better for each of us. It's so slow to get out of this well. As C. said, it's like gaining weight is so easy, then it's so hard and tedious to lose weight with the diet you believe will work...but it takes a loooong time. For me the antidepressants have been stopped after reviewing some side effects with the doc. I also did the dishes today so maybe I'm getting better.

Another friend and I were talking about something I did when I retired 15 years ago. She said I definitely shouldn't expect to have that kind of energy now do I? Well, I said, it would be nice to be able to at least do what I did in 2019.

That meant lots of road trips. I won't go into details but I went to New Mexico and Colorado on one trip, to Columbus Ohio on another, and Tampa Florida for Christmas. Oh and there had been a wedding in Flordia in April also the same year, and of course I drove down and back!

I think because so much happened in 2019, my time was expanded to take it all in. It just was full to overflowing.

But the point of this rambling is that my passage of time speeded up, then practically stopped, and so just 3 months ago feels definitely like over a year ago.

And I just found this on FaceBook (what a source!) Can't be denied. So as of today we're moving into spring...don't have to wait till Feb. 1!!






12 comments:

  1. Hello,
    It is strange how time can feel like it is going fast and slow at the same time. I am glad we are heading towards Spring and longer daylight. Take care, have a wonderful day and week ahead!

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    1. I'm also glad spring is going to bring longer days!

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  2. ...time has never been all that important to me. I never wear a watch.

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    1. I only have the phone these days...and I dreamed it had turned into a little ladies watch. It was a nice tiny faced gold watch. But it didn't work!

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  3. Your life is brightening in more ways than one. It is getting lighter — no longer dark at 4:30. I’s been light out for awhile this morning and it is only 7:20.

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    1. We don't have a light sky that early here. But by 6:30 it is first light.

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  4. Wonder if you experience SAD. That could explain your time slowing down and lack of oomph. So by your chart we're half way through winter. Wish that was true for us here in the north.

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    1. I did go sit in the sunshine a few times when it was in the 60's (rare here in winter) with a friend who has a SAD light. I might invest in one for next year! I know of no one who is really having spring now. It's sort of imaginary.

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  5. The dark days of winter are tough. And do you have a gas stove?

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    1. No, my apartment is totally electric. I do worry about mold, so as often as possible I air it out with fresh air, if it's not too cold.

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There is today, more than ever, the need for a compassionate regenerative world civilization.