I've seen it, grasped it firmly, but then let it slip through my fingers. The end of my rope, the place where I just can't take it any more. (Unknown, ambiguous "IT".)
But the IT I've been dealing with is just my health issues. I don't think all older people spend half this amount of time concerning health. I certainly don't like doing it myself. So I ask your forgiveness for my continuing drama, and if you don't wish to hear my whining, just skip reading all the following.
When the side effects from the latest round of non-specific treatments hit, I folded. Antibiotics are often a good idea, and often not at all a good idea...especially since I get a yeast infection from hell when I take them. Having cat scans of lungs, once was fine. Having probes stuck up my nose (after it had been thankfully numbed)...all ok.
But when a possible torn rotator cuff starts to wake me up by pains in my whole rib cage, there's something else happening. My doctors couldn't figure it out when it came up several years ago...and finally treated me for "shingles pain without a rash." So now I'm taking football size pills for that.
If I didn't have relief.... if a course of antibiotics gave me a recurrance of shingles, and the awful yeast infection...yep, I'd sure be at the end of my rope.
Did I mention the cough from hell hasn't improved? The snot (excuse me, mucous) sample was sent from my nose off to the lab and showed no infection, so the antibiotics weren't treating anything.
I love ranting here, because it's almost anonymous. But then sometimes someone says something that's very helpful...so I listen to comments.
Pain medications are all "over the counter" and I'm grateful for some relief. Hot showers help too. And I can have days without the cough also. Today seems good. When I get tired, or whenever I lie down in the evening because I'm tired...the cough comes back. Apparently a cough isn't a condition. It's the result of another condition. And over-the-counter drugs are all I get...there aren't any prescriptions that are hiding behind the costly specialists.
So relief is either through assuming it's allergy related (generic Clariten-D) or treating the symptom of thickened mucous with Musinex. And nasal sprays. And continue using inhalers for the Asthma and the COPD. The cat-scan confirmed some enlargement of bronchial tubes.
So I've got my rope in hand again.
Going to go make some soup.
I told one doctor I use herbal teas to good effect. He smiled with that "that's nice, dear," look. They do give relief. All the over-the-counter drugs do too. But nothing seems to cure what I have.