Yep, I've been feeling like this lately...slightly out of focus, eyes kind of inward focused, and a zillion books that want my attention!

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Not to be trite (so I won't say, a day late...) but yesterday was the anniversary of something we've mostly come to take for granted.

The 45th anniversary of the invention of the internet.

I don't know what my life was actually like before www.

TV and cable (but I think I used rabbit ears on my set).  Radio.  Phones that were beginning to be cordless.  And even portable phones, which were pretty big...and all you could do was talk on them.  I also had a new invention called a (what were they called, they beeped...ah) beeper.

Before those days, pay phones were available in urban areas.

Before the internet I had to write letters (or cards) and wait a week at least to hear from my friends...unless I paid long distance rates to talk to them.

Also yesterday was Cat Day.  That should be on your calendars next year.

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

No more trite phrases

How long do you think I can write blogs without including trite phrases?  It will be a good use English as a more expressive language.

Does this mean that I have nothing better to say than to look at my grammar?  Perhaps.

II give you a wonderful piece of sculpture that inspires me, as well as resonates with my own mental questions.

And a fascinating piece of art : "Alice Through the Looking Glass" located in Guildford’s Castle Grounds (Surrey, UK.) in a walled garden behind the bowling green, close to the house where Lewis Carroll used to live.

When I went through a wonderful re-birthing ritual in the 1990s, I took on a new name.  Alice.  Haven't really used it, as it's kind of a spirit-name.  So it goes well with my intention to speak with more awareness and honesty.  I didn't include succinctness however.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

The early voting is now happening


It was easy peasy.
Thanks to Katharine (yes spelled that way, and yes her family hails from Tennessee)...who gave me a copy of a sample ballot which looked at non-partisan judge candidates, school board, and so on...listing who had leanings in directions which we share.

Our district of North Carolina has been recently gerrymandered by the NC Republican legislators, with the aim of keeping the Democrats in the Asheville area well under their thumbs.  

We shall see next Wed the results.  I'm quite pleased how many women are voting.

Monday, October 27, 2014

Last Monday in October

What's really permanent?  The patterns in this rock are offset by the footsteps of visitors...but we all know the time and forces it took to make these patterns had nothing to do with people.

Change is the message of October.  Ancestors are honored at the end of this month, with Halloween and Samhain, and All Souls Day, and Dia de los Muertos.  Whatever you name the celebration, it's about the impermanence of people on this wonderful but frail earth.

Remembering an ancestor during meditation is part of my daily ritual.  I thank these ordinary people who somehow created their lives and left a legacy which is humming to my attentions.  The least thing they did was have sex, and have a baby which then grew up to do the same.  But the DNA, or genes as everyone calls it, being passed down to my own generation was not the height of their lives probably.  Their passions began as children, being raised by parents and others, then blossomed as they became adults.  They not only survived, they thrived in whatever aspect of life that they approached.  It might have been hard at times, but I know there was laughter also.

Salute and thanks go to these fore-mothers and fore-fathers.

I hope something I've done in my life (or perhaps am still to do) will be a gift to my descendents.  I wonder what, if anything, will have most meaning for them. 

And beyond all the talk about generations, there's the Great Beyond...that belief in something greater than all of us.  Divine.  Spirit.  God.  Goddess.  Idea.  Universe.  The Great Unknown.

But even that is not permanent.

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Working it out

Keep on Truckin'

Whatever trite or wise saying works for you (or me) it's like a mantra.  You have it in the back of your head for the quiet moments.

I spent yesterday morning at the Tailgate Market.  I wanted to have fun, sell pots, and enjoy the day.  Sometimes we reach a few of our goals!

I'm so lucky to be part of the co-op of Mudbuddies which sells pottery every Sat. morning throughout the summer, right here in Black Mountain.  It's right down the street from me.

Ah, you noticed.  I can find something to be grateful for...which is the best way to pull myself out of the mire of "poor me-ness." 

The wonderful weather, great music, and friends all around.  What a day.

And so it goes.  Each day.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

At the end of my rope

I've seen it, grasped it firmly, but then let it slip through my fingers.  The end of my rope, the place where I just can't take it any more.  (Unknown, ambiguous "IT".)

But the IT I've been dealing with is just my health issues.  I don't think all older people spend half this amount of time concerning health.  I certainly don't like doing it myself.  So I ask your forgiveness for my continuing drama, and if you don't wish to hear my whining, just skip reading all the following.

When the side effects from the latest round of non-specific treatments hit, I folded.  Antibiotics are often a good idea, and often not at all a good idea...especially since I get a yeast infection from hell when I take them.  Having cat scans of lungs, once was fine.  Having probes stuck up my nose (after it had been thankfully numbed)...all ok.

But when a possible torn rotator cuff starts to wake me up by pains in my whole rib cage, there's something else happening.  My doctors couldn't figure it out when it came up several years ago...and finally treated me for "shingles pain without a rash."  So now I'm taking football size pills for that.

If I didn't have relief....  if a course of antibiotics gave me a recurrance of shingles, and the awful yeast infection...yep, I'd sure be at the end of my rope.

Did I mention the cough from hell hasn't improved?  The snot (excuse me, mucous) sample was sent from my nose off to the lab and showed no infection, so the antibiotics weren't treating anything.

I love ranting here, because it's almost anonymous.  But then sometimes someone says something that's very I listen to comments.  

Pain medications are all "over the counter" and I'm grateful for some relief.  Hot showers help too. And I can have days without the cough also.  Today seems good.  When I get tired, or whenever I lie down in the evening because I'm tired...the cough comes back.  Apparently a cough isn't a condition.  It's the result of another condition.  And over-the-counter drugs are all I get...there aren't any prescriptions that are hiding behind the costly specialists.

So relief is either through assuming it's allergy related (generic Clariten-D) or treating the symptom of thickened mucous with Musinex.  And nasal sprays.  And continue using inhalers for the Asthma and the COPD.  The cat-scan confirmed some enlargement of bronchial tubes.   

So I've got my rope in hand again.

Going to go make some soup.
I told one doctor I use herbal teas to good effect.  He smiled with that "that's nice, dear," look.  They do give relief.  All the over-the-counter drugs do too.  But nothing seems to cure what I have.

Thursday, October 23, 2014

More uniforms

I'll continue sharing old yearbook pictures of young people in uniforms.

Ft. Worth Texas, 1931  My dad's best friend (Earl Truelove) is in the Central High School band.
He's listed at the top of members as the Major.  (See my post about him HERE last week on Sepia Saturday.)  Since then I've heard from my cousin about her family members who were in bands that being the major means he didn't play an instrument.

My father's older brother, Chauncey, was in an ROTC uniform also, right column in photo below, 3rd from bottom.

Sepia Saturday shows some uniformed gentlemen of the law.

 I have a son who works security for parade floats in Tampa every year...but doesn't get a uniform at all like these. Come over HERE to see what others post based upon this picture!  And continue with my looking for relatives in old yearbooks here!

By 1933 my father had met my mother probably, in Jefferson High School in San Antonio, TX.  She signed her name (Mataley Munhall) by her picture below, the right column at the bottom of portraits.  Is she in Company C's group picture?  Yes, front and center (well, to the right of the tall young man in the very center.)

I don't think my father (George Rogers) was in Company C until 1934.  Then he was listed among the members, but I can't find him in the crowd (photo below).  But where is my mother in 1934?

Mataley went to the newly formed Company D in 1934...and she was then listed as a sponsor.  I think George missed his chance, (that time) since she changed her marching company.  Incidentally, like many yearbooks, the group picture below does not have my mother located in the place that is indicated by her name.  She is actually the girl in the middle of the front row, with her eyes closed.  I know you were wondering about that!

I mentioned before  how these young people wore a swastika on their hats...(HERE).
I think it was innocent, but when I remember Hitler's youth troops, it is even possible that his influence came into south Texas through the German connection.  These high school students certainly appeared to have enjoyed wearing uniforms.

Yes the club was made of young women who met "as a social aid to the Battalion"...and were called the Swastika Club.  It is possible some members of this social club are still alive and could answer my questions, but highly unlikely...and I don't think I'll try to find them.  So this is a mystery.  Except I'm sure the young women stopped using that insignia about 1940.

The highschool band also had great looking uniforms in San Antonio.

"Reverence for Life"

An interesting quote came my way this morning.
I don't claim to know a thing about Albert Schweitzer. (I did include some info from Wikipedia below the quote.)

But I liked reading these words of his. Editing was done by my friend.

"I am life which wills to live, in the midst of life which wills to live.

As in my own will to live, there is a longing for a wider life and
pleasure, with dread of annihilation and pain: so is it also in the will to live all around me, whether it can express itself before me or remains dumb.  The will to live is everywhere present, even as in me..........
Ethics consist in my experiencing the  compulsion to show to all wills to live the same reverence as I do my own.  A person is truly ethical when obeying the compulsion to help all life which one is able to assist, and shrinks from injuring anything that lives............ 
(But it is true that in practice, not all life can be saved)  We are forced to choose....which forms of life, and even which individuals, we shall save and which we shall destroy.
But the principle of reverence for life is nonetheless universal....

(It) compels one to decide for oneself in each case how far one can remain ethical and how far one must submit to the necessity for destruction and injury to life.  No one can decide (for anyone else) at what point, on each occasion, lies the extreme limit of possibility for persistence in the preservation and furtherance of life.  (Each person) has to judge this issue , by letting oneself be guided by a feeling of the highest possible responsibility toward other life.  We must never let ourselves become blunted.  We are living in truth when we experience these conflicts more profoundly."

Albert Schweitzer,  (14 January 1875 – 4 September 1965) was a German—and later French—theologian, organist, philosopher, physician, and medical missionary in Africa, also known for his interpretive life of Jesus. He was born in the province of Alsace-Lorraine, at that time part of the German Empire, considered himself French and wrote mostly in French.
He received the 1952 Nobel Peace Prize for his philosophy of "Reverence for Life",[1] expressed in many ways, but most famously in founding and sustaining the Albert Schweitzer Hospital in Lambaréné, now in Gabon, west central Africa (then French Equatorial Africa). As a music scholar and organist, he studied the music of German composer Johann Sebastian Bach.